2005 Dodge Magnum R/T AWD

Heart breaker.

Gaaaaahhhhh....

Wish it had the optional AUX input, which most do.

They pulled this car around for our inspection and a test drive and my wife said, "Wow. That's a really nice car." I gotta admit, she was right. She usually is. The interior, though a bit plain, was also very nice. I was instantly comfortable in it and driving it. Many people have complained about the view out, especially to the rear three-quarters, but I had absolutely no problem. I've been in worse, much worse.

Booya. Only thing better would be the SRT-8, but you can't get that with AWD.

The 340 hp, 390 torques Hemi was just plain awesome to drive. Yes, this is an MB E-Class based vehicle and it does feel a little like driving a 4400 pound tank, but it flies with a 0-60 in under six seconds. The mpg is a rather weak 15/22, but it would be even worse with out the cylinder deactivation system.

Frankly, this wagon was me. It would be a logical step from the Shadowagon and it left me with many ironies...me, owning a Dodge/Chrysler...that's based on a Mercedes...

Low miles and a reasonable asking price.

So we was ready to sign to sign on the dotted line until I made the mistake of breaking out the measuring tape. We need the bumper height to be somewhere around 25"-27", with 29" being the absolute limit. This thing has a bumper height of...wait for it...31 freakin' inches! Goodgawd, that's the height of some full-size SUVs! Our dogs will not utilize a ramp; they'll hurt themselves first. Alright alright alright, but what about the height of cargo opening? It's 27 inches. Our big boy is 29 inches at the shoulder. He can bend his head, but not his legs. His breed just doesn't operate that way.

Form screws up function. Damn you Daimler-Chrysler!

Wistfully, we walked away. Like I said, heart breaker.